Another day wasted as I turn to the Twittering classes to provide suggestions for my column

What’s that? You think it’s easy filling a page each week with this gibberish? Well, it is. But some weeks aren’t as easy as others. For one thing, pretty much all I’ve been aware of all week is snow tumbling from the sky, and everyone else has already written about that – and I mean everyone, from Melanie Phillips to the late Roy Kinnear. The only other thing I’ve noticed is some kind of acute muscular spasm in my neck and left shoulder, and that’s hardly entertaining, except maybe for the bit where the doctor rather brilliantly prescribed me diazepam so I necked some and walked very slowly around the Westfield shopping centre listening to Henry Mancini’s Pink Panther theme on repeat on an MP3 player, smiling eerily at shoppers.Anyway, being stumped, I decided to ask the people following me on Twitter for some one-word suggestions as to what to write about. For the two or three of you who don’t already know, Twitter – which has garnered almost as much coverage as the snow in recent weeks – is a monumentally pointless “social networking” thingamajig that lets you type 140-word ponderings or questions to an audience of other timewasters.

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